studying + masturbation = awesome!
Last week I had midterms. With three classes summer A, even arguably easy ones, the work tends to pile up when you spend too much of your time writing about sex, daydreaming about sex and then having sex, even when it is by yourself. Yes, I am in a self-inflicted slump and have resorted to being a chronic masturbator. I should be honest here and admit that even when I am getting some, I tend to masturbate, well, all the time.
One of my good friends swears she can even tell when I haven’t “flicked the bean” around frequently enough. She describes me as snappy, irritable and without that giddy glow. I think she’s right.
I’m not sure what average masturbation patterns are exactly among women in their early to mid 20s, but I’m guessing I would be considered an outlier.
I must, yes must, get off at least once a day, but prefer 3 times daily. I don’t think I even eat that many times a day.
While studying for my midterms I developed a foolproof study plan, which, perhaps, could work for you as well. For every 4 hours I devote to studying, I can reward myself with my vibrator or some porn or some good old-fashioned manual stimulation and an ongoing fantasy involving Jonathon Rhys Myers’ Henry VIII character from the Showtime series The Tudors. Sorry, I’m a history major, what can I say? But that’s a discussion for a whole other column entirely.
My point – studying = good, masturbation = good. Studying + masturbating = AWESOME! And that’s an equation we can all understand, whether our midterm is in Math for Liberal Arts Majors or Elements of Partial Differential Equations.